Living a life of another

As I was about to take another sip of Americano, a text came from my aunt, Aunt Lucy greeting me a happy birthday. Hoping I would finally be the girl who I wished to be whenever my birthday draws closer.

Nothing but a sigh came out of my mouth, as I read the message, realizing the day has finally come. The day I will transform which I don’t know HOW that will happen.

As I looked at the starry sky through the window, snow starts to pour just like the day when my father, Henry Robert Montgomery, the owner of Montgomery Hotel, the 4-star hotel located at the Upper Eastside of New York, told me to be a boy. It was when I was about 7 when he told me to be who I am not.

“Madison, listen to your father carefully I love you very much, I do.” My father said cautiously. “But… I want you to do me a favor I want you to be my son, not a daughter.”

“I-I don’t understand father?” I asked slowly.

“Honey, do you really need to do this? Madison can’t be a son, you know that!” Mother said as her voice trembles.

As father was about to shout as his hand raises upon mom no words came out from his mouth but a deep sigh. I never saw him so disappointed. I felt so displeased for who I am. He wanted a son not a daughter like me.

“I’ll do it father! If it means to make you happy, I’ll do it!” as those words came out of my mouth, father immediately turned his head with relief in his eyes and patted my head. I guess this is the best for now. I guess this is what is right.

“How can you do this! To our daughter!” Mother exclaimed.

“Don’t worry it will be up to the age of 18, by then you could decide to continue to be my son or as a girl which you are now.” Ignoring mother.

A girl? Not a daughter? As I open my eyes, I see mom trying to cover her tears, tears of sadness and regret. Without me noticing, tears suddenly pour out of my eyes. I try to stop them but they just keep on falling.

“Here is your Blueberry Cheesecake… sir” said the waitress, trying to catch my attention, as she glares at me with interests. I haven’t seen her here before. She must be new.

“Thank you.” I said softly.

“Is there anything more you’d like to order?” she asked.

“No, thank you this would be all.” I said gently smiling at her as she places the cake at the wooden table.

“If there is anything more you need, just contact me” leaving a card beneath the plate with her number written on it.

As she leaves, she keeps on looking at me on the way. I can’t help but laugh softly feeling sorry for her, for she doesn’t know what she is up for.

The place is full of Jazz music. The smell of Brandy feels the air. Men with expensive suits laugh and chat around about their businesses bragging how much they succeed, which I know some of them are but lies. The place is mostly filled with elite men, some whom my father knows, and few with women. I guess that’s the reason why I came here often. I feel less insecure when I’m surrounded with men rather than women. Thinking about it, this started when I needed to walk like them, speak like them and be like them. Weird, I can’t really recall how to be like a girl. The only memories I could remember are to properly combing the hair and to love dolls.

As usual the middle-aged bartender prepares the check for me as the clock strikes 2 in the morning. As I pay the check for tonight, I thanked him for being a good friend. He noticed that I would no longer come back. So he offered a cup printed with the name of the bar “Ab Ovo to remind me of the place.

Finally woke up because of the deem light that surpasses the dark blue curtains. Out of shock I screamed shortly, seeing my room filled with gifts wrapped with pink wrappers, mostly with clothes, bags, shoes from Victoria Secret, Gucci, Chanel and so much more, even jewelries which I can’t seem to calculate how much it would cost. I bet one of them could be as much as the cost of my life. Gulp. But from them all, the small box with my name printed on it catches my eye the most. As I open it suddenly tears starts to fall from my eyes for the necklace, shape of a swan, which mom gave me before she died was placed perfectly. I thought I completely lost it.
When I try to remove the necklace from the small box, a folded paper falls to the floor with a scent of a pine tree leaving to it. It must be father. After wearing the necklace I unfolded it. A small message was written in his elegant script.

Come to the library as soon as you read this. Happy Birthday my child.
-Sincerely, your Father

There were two voices inside the library, two male voices. One of them is husky and deep. Definitely that’s fathers. While the other one seems to be new. His voice seems to be from a young man around 20’s I think, somehow deep but soft, his laughter was gently done like a high class gentlemen, and he doesn’t seem to speak loud. I wonder who could this young man be?

As I lean closer to the door, I realized I was falling to the ground.
Wondering who could have opened the door, it was father just as I assumed.

“Madison, this is Austin Williams. He is known as to be one of the most…”

He seems to be young, but tall at that looking at his legs. I wonder how tall he could be, 6 foot? Hmmm Or maybe over it? He really has a good feature, Oh! His a brunette! Wait, isn’t it brunette is only referred to girls?

“Madison…Madison! Are you listening?” angrily.

“Yes, father!” I startled.

“Madison, Austin will be your teacher to teach you how to be a proper lady. Understood?”

“Yes father…But”

“But?” He asked raising one of his eyebrows.

“…Ummm”

“You’re wondering how old I am, aren’t you? And why a man would teach you not a lady herself?” the young man said as he drinks his tea.

“Y-Yes…” embarrassed of how he figured what I was thinking.

“I am 23 years old, and seeing your face it seems like you were not listening at all to what your father was talking about, Is that how a proper gentleman,” he smirks. “I mean proper lady. Repeating your father’s message, I was the teacher of the princesses in England for 4 years teaching them the right etiquettes of a proper lady.” He reminded with a cold tone.

“Since I knew him when he was little and I know what his capable of I hired him, he will be teaching you for a year. Then let’s see what would happen. I hope you would behave properly Madison.” Father told me also with a cold tone.

“AH! I almost forgot you will be trained at our summerhouse in Seattle, starting next month.” He added somehow his voice toned down. “In the meantime, Madison get ready. For you Austin, your things are all at the summerhouse already so you could rest there for a while.”

“Thank you sir Montgomery.”

“No! It should be me thanking you.” Chuckling as he gets a sip of the tea.

“Well, I heard today is your birthday Ms. Montgomery…”

“Madison, just call me Madison.” I interfered.

“…Madison it is. Well I would like to give you this as a gift, Happy Birthday.” His voice seems to be sincere but why do I feel like the way he smiles at me is sarcastic.

He finally left as the sun was about to set. He greeted everyone with a bow to show respect better than the way I could, but the way he looked at me as he rises kept on repeating in my head over and over again. There was but a cold feeling in his eyes, somehow dark. Maybe he doesn’t like me.

Finally a month has passed and nothing but feat stirs inside of me as the days draw closer. Recalling the image of his eyes glaring at me with such hatred and now I can’t believe but the day has come for the beginning of my training.

Opening the window of the van the smell of pine trees surpasses me as we drive over the city of Seattle passing the 16th Avenue Southwest. The sky was so blue with huge white fluffy clouds fleeting by, it felt a great day to have a picnic, at my surprise there were a lot of families having picnic nearby.

I could sense we are finally near our summerhouse seeing the sign of the Coenosium Rock Garden passing us by. The house is built from pine trees but we ended up painting the house white to create a clean and serene impact. I would always be thrilled to visit there remembering the memories of fishing, hunting, and even swimming in the nearby lake…Austin… I must not be really feeling well.

There I see a man wearing a white sweater that compliments with the house. He looked like an angel or a prince like from the fairytales which mom showed me while she was alive. Curios of who he could be I leaned closer and noticed… It was Austin.

“Good Afternoon Madison, glad to see you again” said Austin sarcastically.

I did not answer.

He smirked as I ignore while getting off the van. Looking around, it really brings a lot of memories, memories of me playing with dad, memories of having a barbecue with Aunt Lucy and Uncle Pete, memories of Mom. Just when the tears were starting to pour, a high pitch scream came inside the house giving me a jump.

“AUSTIN! There is a lizard! Inside the shower! Take it away! Take it away!” the little girl screamed.

The girl seems to be 5 feet tall. Her skin glows like the skin of a baby for it’s as white just like milk. Her eyes are roundish big with long eye lashes giving her a high spirited look. But out of this what shines from her the most is her hair, its red, curly red that is also somehow like a burnt orange to a bright copper. She reminds of the painting of Mary Magdalene which I saw in Delaware Art museum in Wilmington, which I went there 2 years ago with Aunt Lucy.

“Austin!” she shouted.

“Don’t worry about it. It will flee if you will get closer to it. Somehow I feel sorrier for the lizard than you for it have to hear your loud scream over and over again.” He teased.

The face of the girl starts to change its color matching it to the color of her hair. But it starts to loosen up when she catches my eye. She suddenly starts to smile and get hyper running towards me.

“Hi there! You must be Madison. Wow! You really do look like a boy, a pretty boy to that!”

“U-Ummm..”

“I’m Mary Elizabeth Forrest. I am the assistant of Austin. Let’s be good friends!” She said jollily.

“N-Nice to meet you, Mary.” I stuttered.

“Don’t be deceived by her looks she is 26 years old, an old lady.” Austin said as he removes and places my bags inside the house.

“Y-You don’t need to do tha-t…”

“How dare you call me an old lady!!!” Mary interfered. “Hmp! Don’t worry he seems to be cold always to others but he really is a sweet young boy. Now shall we enter and start the training.”

“Already?” I gasped.

“Of course, the faster we start the closer your dreams would come true, honey.”

For 11 months Austin and Mary taught me the basic steps of being a fine lady. The way to walk. Which I would say is the hardest! For I needed to walk a straight line with 4 books at top of my head and with the right posture of my body. I think it took me a week to master it. Austin would always end up shouting at me “That’s wrong! Do it again!” or “Are you stupid!” that we would end up fighting.

The way to eat, this one I hate the most, for I couldn’t even eat as much as I always do. I even remember I was tied up to the chair. I couldn’t even get the spoon and forks properly. It really felt like I was Princess Mia from the Princess Diaries movie I’d say. Only worse. Continuing the way to speak, bow, move, so much more.

However, at times I feel lonely or sad, Mary would always cheer up, giving me hot cocoa with marshmallows on top to cheer me up and motivation not to give up.

Austin, his harsh, mean, short tempered I’d say, that I would like to punch in the face but somehow he seems to be gentle too thinking about it. Like the time when I had a fever last week. I found out it was him who took care of me the whole night just to let my fever down, according to Mary. I guess Mary was right all along. About him.

There were some intimidations between me and Austin which I just can’t seem to understand but somehow I feel them. Mary even teases about us often, especially after Austin taught me how to dance the Waltz. I even had my hopes up, hoping he would feel the same way I do to him. But one night as I approach him about my feelings, he rejected me. Hoping I could understand that he can’t engage into a relationship with the person he works with.

And there he broke my heart.

After a month, we received an invitation of my very own birthday at the Grand Ball room of my dad’s hotel in New York. Surprisingly Mary was the one who conducted and organized throughout with Aunt Lucy, but more to that I was more surprised to see that the media was invited. According to Mary, my father plans to broadcast the news that his only son was actually a daughter. Me. I do wonder if he knows what he’s doing. For definitely it would lead to a big mess, a big story.

The room gave an elegant aura as the room was colored with cream and gold. The huge chandelier really catches the attention of everyone as it glows and shines throughout. There were waiters and waitresses dressed in black and white blending in well with the atmosphere. And music, jazz music which I love the most fills the air.

There were so much people, wearing in formal attire, mostly family friends, famous people like Brad Pitt with Angelina Jolie, the mayor of New York and also some whom I can’t seem to recognize.

Everyone looks at me with curiosity and disbelief of who I am. Except one. A young man wearing a tux with a white rose in his coat pocket standing outside the door, leading to the rose garden, looking at me with such tender eyes.

I never saw him looking at me that way before. He seems kind, sweet, and even beautiful. I must be completely out of my mind. He might not even feel the same way. But even so my heart keeps on falling for him.

“Hi.” He says gently. “How are you doing?” Austin said

“Fine, but scared. Even c-conscious.” I paused. “Do I look that weird? Or is the news that bad?” I asked

“No. They are all looking at you, for they can’t believe that such beauty is hidden within you.”

“Thank you. That makes me feel.. I-I don’t know.” I chuckled worriedly.

“Don’t worry, it will be fine.” He says while touching my hair.

At the stage, Father calls everyone for a toast and me to accompany him on stage. But surprisingly he made an announcement:
“I would like to thank everyone to join us here today, to celebrate my daughter’s birthday. I have kept her from everyone her true identity to a surprise which I have prepared just for my daughter.” He said. “A gift which you will cherish always. An engagement.”

Everyone gasped. Upon hearing the news. Even I who can’t seem to understand.

“You are to be engaged to the first son of the Dickens family.”

Engaged? To the first son of the Dickens?

“As you all know the Dickens has been known for their famous elite hotel here in New York. And all throughout the years since Madison was born. We have been good friends. May I have the spotlight, please.”

As the light turns off and the spotlight moves from one person to another, my body starts to tremble wondering who this man is. As the light starts to move slowly, it stopped to a man with brown hair, a height of 6 feet, I think. Who looks at me with a smile which girls find irresistibly attractive.

“Austin Williams Dickens, the first son of the Dickens family could you please come on stage. As we give a toast to both of you,”

“Thank you sir.”

“I don’t understand. Why? How come? I thought you can’t engage in a relationship with someone you work with?” I asked still trembling in disbelief.

“I’m not working anymore with you. The contract is done. I actually knew you since little, but I kept my distance just as your father planned for all of this.” He said gently holding my hand.

“F-Father?”

“I’m sorry if I caused you so much trouble. I wanted the best for you.” Father said.

“Then up to now, everything was all but a lie?” I said angrily.

“No.” said Austin trying to catch my eye. “It wasn’t. Everything is not. To do this properly may I?

“What do you mean?” I asked.

Then suddenly Austin kneels on his knees and gets a small box out of his pocket, the same box which holds the lost necklace of my mother on my 18th birthday.

“This box, you?” I asked, not noticing what he obviously would do.

“Yes, I was the one who found it when you were little, when you were bullied by others. I protected you and kept you safe but somehow you forgotten me.” He said sadly. “I’m sorry if I rejected you last month, I wanted to be the first, I wanted to do this right. Madison Montgomery, would you be my girlfriend from now on and if so my wife in the future.”

No words came to my mouth, but tears. But still forcibly I spoke the two words with my might, that would change my life again from here:

“I do.”

Oktapodi : Alone inside the Icebox

There were bumps and thumps
As if the earth collides
There was Darkness in the air
Realizing my life is coming to an end

As I part goodbye
To a life I had with you
I cant help but cry
For a single goodbye could not be said

Tears and fears start to rise
As the bumps and thumps increases
Now I see that we can’t be one
But even so, I pray we still could be

Then suddenly a light appears
And Yes! My prayer has been heard
For my Romeo has come to me
To save me from death that confronts me.

Humor: A weird friend of Mine

I have a friend back at home
Who I can’t seem to understand
Sure, he is cute and adorable
For he has a fur as white as snow

He sleeps in places I can’t understand
Like under the couch, above the laundry
And even the corner of my room
When his own expensive bed is waiting just a mile away.

He loves to jump up and down
Like a rabbit in the forest
But what’s more bizarre
Is that he thinks he’s a human rather than a dog.

Yes, he seems to be Lovable
But you may be surprised
For his full of oddness
Could cause you death but with a smile

“The Life of a Poor”

The Cries of Poor Souls roars day and night
Begging for food and shelter for their Life
They suffer of shame, rejection, and hunger
Living a life full of pain and danger

Wanting to live like of those with pretty clothes
To walk around with no worries but full of hope
The warmth of having a house is what they seek
As they smile with their family from what they picked.

The leaders of the country say this and that
Giving the poor hopes as each days pass
But now their busy filling their pockets
Which they got from the poor souls pocket

So why don’t we stand in this mainland
To help of those that needs a hand
For one simple act no matter how small or big
Could bring happiness to a life of grief

Diary - A guide from Sonnet 77

The book of records
Is the book they seek
That would be helpful for you and me.

At first I didn’t care or understand at all
But as the time ticks tocks, every minute of a day
It came to ring the bell of what they have to say.

Each pages of the book
Holds the memory of mine
It’s like holding the lost treasure that was left behind

Looking at the mirror
I see a wrinkle in thy face
Realizing time has passed in haste.

My memory loses as the clock moves
But thankful I am of what I’ve done
For I have this book that holds of who I am
Aiding me to recall the youthful days that I spent.

A Philippine Value: Hospitability

Hospitable is what they describe
Of the people that lives in a country that rains and shines.
Though the temperature is very high
But their hearts still gleams like the rainbows in the sky

Their kindness shines through out all
Giving good impressions to one and all
No matter how dark or white you could be
They would still show a warm smile for you and me.

Their generous heart surprises the most
As I see them leading as the hosts
They give us the best of everything
Even if it would leave them with nothing

They truly are Hospitable! I must say
Since I was born till today
I guess that truly is what I could know
Of all the things of a Filipino